Don't Call Me Ma'am

What is it about young people? Do they really think it's cute to ask if I'm old enough to buy that wine? Seriously, nobody thinks that's funny. Well, nobody over the mental age of 12. It just gives me another reason to drink.


I guess calling me Ma'am isn't really an insult, just a reminder that I'm old. So I don't really blame someone for using that term, but it still hurts. There are worse things to be called, sure. (And I've heard them all.)


Getting old is hard enough without constant reminders from everyone I encounter. If one more old man treats me rudely because I'm not young and attractive, I'm pretty sure I'll go ballistic. There's a good chance I'll be arrested. But if there's just one woman on the jury who's been through menopause, I won't be convicted.

You might think I look like a harmless old lady. Don't let that smile fool you (it's really just a smirk anyway). My mood can turn on a dime. And you never know which personality is lurking just beneath the surface. Make your jokes and comments at your own risk.
To all you young whippersnappers, stop and think before you speak. And for the love of God, don't EVER call me "young lady".